April 4th is Chinese Ching Ming Festival, one of the 24 segments of the Chinese calendar. Ching Ming is also known as ‘Remembrance of Ancestors Day’ or ‘Grave Sweeping Day’. Today, all over China, people visited their ancestors’ graves and offered flowers, food, and paper replicas of anything that might be materially desirable – stereos, TVs, cigarettes, dining room sets, and money in every denomination. These items are burned not in memory of their ancestors but as a means of transference.
Paper stereo and air-conditioner
paper tea and mugs
Paper toiletries and effects
Paper Smokes
This day is also my parents 39th wedding anniversary. Though they won’t be needing a paper DVD player anytime soon, I offer my deepest respect to them for making family a priority and loving each other so well, for their perspective and their decency, for their fortitude and their capacity for joy.
My grandmother clipped a grace out of Emily Post’s column in the New York Times many years ago. Every Thanksgiving or Christmas, it turns up under someone’s seat cushion to be read aloud before the meal. Yellowed and torn, glued to a faded square of blue construction paper, the grace says something to the effect of…
‘Families give you the roots to grow, the wings to fly away, and the security of knowing there is always a home to return to. This family will always be together.’
My parent’s marriage and the home they have created has been my foundation, my continuity, enabling me to spread my wings and always there upon my return. Thank you both for seeing the wide world and for offering it up to me. Happy Ching Ming. Happy Anniversary.
Dad circa 1974 with me...
Dad at Mui Wo Pier with Frances - 2009
Mom circa 1973
Mom in the DB Plaza with Frances - 2009
what love. life keeps living and giving. your parents are beautiful and so is your little family, too.
much love
mb
This blog was my favorite!